A baby becomes a little boy

Published 3:30 pm Wednesday, August 20, 2003

By By LISA TINDELL, Managing editor
It has finally happened, my baby has become a little boy!
Oh, I know, he's four years old and he's not been a baby for two or three years now. But you know how moms are -- our children are always our babies.
I registered Landon for pre-school on Monday and it was a traumatic experience. Not because the task was difficult or because the people were unpleasant. Just the opposite is true. I couldn't have been treated nicer and the task was a breeze. But just knowing that my child will now be in the care of someone he is not related to is somewhat disturbing.
I know that he will be well taken care of while at pre-school. He'll get the attention he needs when he gets ready to open his bag of chips for snack. He'll get the help he needs when he gets frustrated writing his name or his numbers. He'll have someone there to help him blow his nose if he gets the sniffles. But no matter how well they take care of him there, it won't be me taking care of the job.
After meeting his new teacher during registration, I feel a little more confident about his being able to cope during the days he will spend there. He carried on an intelligent conversation with the teacher and seemed to be comfortable in doing so. That makes me feel a little better too.
My husband and I have been preparing our son for this event for weeks now. He has a new backpack and a new lunch box. He has packed and unpacked that backpack a hundred times or more and has eaten cookies and juice from the lunch box on several occasions. However, no amount of preparation for him has prepared us for the big day that is coming in less than a week.
You probably have noticed that this column has a lot to do with how I feel and what I am going through. Well, from all I can tell, this school stuff is a little more stressful on me than it is on my son.
Co-workers have furthered the assumption that it will be more rough on me than on him. One co-worker said that when she put her son on the bus for the first time, she stood at the end of the sidewalk to wave to him as the bus pulled away. To her dismay, her son was so busy with others on the bus, that he wasn't even looking as he left for school.
I haven't experienced that just yet. My son won't ride the bus the pre-school. I'll be taking him myself. It scares me just a little know that the day will come when he'll say "just let me out in front, Mom" when we pull up in front of the school. If by some chance I get to walk him to his room he'll ask me to "please don't kiss me bye today." It's then that I'll truly realize that he dose not need me for every little aspect of his life.
I know though that when he walks into that room, puts his lunch box on the shelf and takes his place at the table, I won't be in his thoughts. He'll be too busy meeting new friends and hearing about interesting things from his teacher.
I know I'll cry. At least that's what I'm expecting since I have been told that by every other mother I know. He won't cry. He's a big boy now. Learning new things and getting great ideas from someone other than myself.
I'm scared, anxious, sad, nostalgic and a little excited all at the same time. I'm happy that Landon will learn new things and begin to broaden his world with ideas expressed by others. I'm just a little sad to know that the center of his world doesn't revolve around a mom and a dad.
My son is no longer a baby. My only hope is that "my baby" will show a little excitement in seeing me at the end of his first day of school. I've got my fingers crossed.