Broadway Joe in trouble over remarks

Published 4:24 am Wednesday, January 7, 2004

By Staff
Have y'all been keeping an eye on the news lately? It seems that Joe Willie Namath is in the headlines again.
That's right, Joe Willie Namath. For some of you so youthful it's disgusting, Joe Namath was one of the greatest NFL quarterbacks of all time. After a stellar college career at the University of Alabama, Joe went into the old AFL with the New York Jets. Pretty soon after that the Super Bowl was created, which was intended to match up the champions of the AFL and NFL in order to determine just who was the true world champion of pro football each year.
The first two Super Bowls were won by Vince Lombardi's Green Bay Packers, and the general feeling at the time in the NFL was that the AFL basically stunk. And that feeling lasted only as long as those first two Super Bowls, because the third one matched up the Baltimore Colts against Joe Namath's New York Jets. The Colts were heavily favored, but Joe Willie and the Jets sprang one of the greatest upsets of all time, beating the Colts 16-7.
This game alone made Joe Namath an international celebrity. But there was more to him than just football. Joe Namath loved fast cars, faster women, and having lots of fun. He gave reporters quotes like, "I can't wait to get up every morning, cause I get better lookin' every day."
Now, let's get back to what Joe has done to get into the headlines again. It seems that he was on the sidelines for a recent Jets-Patriots game when he was approached for an interview by Suzy Kolber, an ESPN reporter. During the course of the interview, Joe said to Suzy, "I want to kiss you." Apparently, at that point, Suzy cut the interview short and threw it back to the in-booth announcers. It never did say whether Joe got the requested smooch or not.
As y'all might expect, lots of uproar has resulted from Joe's simple request. I'm sure that all those feminists that want us men to act neutered will take umbrage at what I'm about to say, but I think Joe was just being Joe. What's wrong with wanting to kiss a pretty girl? And the thing is, he didn't force himself on her or anything, he just politely asked her for a smooch. Hey, I have no problem with that, in fact, it sets me to thinking that if I had the freedom to just go out and smooch any woman I wanted to, just who would she be?
The following are my top picks and why.
1) Vanna White -- You know, Vanna has been on the Wheel of Fortune program for years, but she still looks like a million bucks. Also, she seems to be pretty straight-laced and proper on the outside, but I sense that underneath it all that she could be a real panther. Based on that hope alone, Vanna is a top-three smoochable candidate.
3) Mary Therese -- If y'all watch WMAZ-13 you've seen Mary Therese. Man, what an attractive, classy woman. My guess is that she could light a match just by looking at it, and that's an understatement. I know that she probably wouldn't even let me cut her grass, let alone smooch her, but a guy can dream, can't he?
So you see, Joe Willie and I have a little something in common -- we both want to smooch women who don't want to let us. Still, when all is said and done, he's still Joe Willie Namath, one of the greatest NFL quarterbacks of all time. A guy who will be remembered for a long, long time. As for me, I'm still Ed Williams, and I'm still married, and I just realized that I've openly talked about smooching all these other women right out here in print.
All I can do now is hope that I'll be around to write another column next week.

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