Foster parents needed
Published 2:32 pm Wednesday, May 13, 2009
There are currently openings for the following positions. Mom, Mommy, Mama, Dad, Daddy, Dada, and Pop. The job description includes long term, team players to work in often-chaotic environments. Availability is needed for 24-hour shifts that will include evenings, weekends, and most shifts in between. Extensive courier duties are also required.
The responsibilities are for a lifetime. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until there is a need for $5.00. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets, and stuck zippers. Must be willing to face embarrassment occasionally.
There is no possibility for promotion or advancement. It is your job to remain in the same position for years without complaining. You will need constant retraining and updating your skills so you will be in control of your environment constantly.
There is no experience needed. On-the-job training is offered. Continuing education credits for experienced candidates is available. There are no wages. In fact, you will pay them. And they will require frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is expected upon there 18th birthday to help them move to a secondary education environment (college). When you die, you will be expected to give them anything that is left. Oddly, with this reverse-salary pay scheme, you will find that you actually enjoy it and wish you could do more.
And there are some benefits. While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no paid holidays, or stock options, this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love, and free hugs when you play your cards right.
May is National Foster Care month. This is a time to show appreciation for people who make a difference. These unsung heroes include those serving as foster parents, relative caregivers, advocates, social workers, and many other volunteers. Thanks to these unsung heroes, many formerly abused or neglected children will be safe tonight and not go to bed hungry.
In Escambia County we are always in need of new foster homes and funding for foster children. For more information on becoming a foster parent or making a tax-deductible donation to the Escambia County Foster and Adoptive Parent Association, please call Escambia County DHR at 251-809-2000.
Finally, please take time this month to show appreciation to the people involved with foster care. I challenge churches, businesses, and individuals to do something special to honor these special people for their desire to be “givers.”
Greg and Rhonda Dawkins